Sheila Junniar / 1988 / Indonesia / Foucault's admirer / I was born when the sun currently transits the constellation of Gemini / I'm attracted easily by beach, get lost when traveling, and stars / You may say anything but your opinion does not matter to me.

A Trace Amount of My Worrisome Heart (and Mind)

sexual harassment and abuse has been a popular topic lately, and it’s pretty much consuming me (a lot of people too). having a son doesn’t make me less worry because nowadays sexual abuse don’t only  happen to girls/women, but little boys, even babies. the importance of introducing sex and moral lesson maybe become #1 priority now. you know, every time i watch tv news or social media, most people are cursing and blaspheme these ruthless thugs. they scream moral that seems fade away, how saddening. how come those jerks hurt weak ones like babies and kids. the worst part is the wound will still be there ‘til the victims breath the last air. how their sadism will affect those kids’ future, not impossible will they have deviant in the future. but criminal wouldn’t think that far, nor they feel ashamed of what they did. god, what kind of world my son’s living in? my heart is aching. this world has become a major madness disaster –where it’s not safe anymore to let kids run around without being so worry about kidnapping or abusing. ooh yes, of course i’m freaked out about it. who doesn’t? :(

  -  17 April

You say I’m a dreamer, we’re two of a kind

Both of us searching for some perfect world we know we’ll never find

So perhaps I should leave here, yeah go far away

But you know that there’s nowhere that I’d rather be than with you here today”

(Source: Spotify)

  -  17 April
"As women, we are taught to be tiny. To have small bodies, to never be imposing. The ideal of our gender are thin and childlike, hairless and dainty. We are defined by our bodies; defined by our control over them. We are taught to obsess over our physicality and to be repulsed by our desires and intelligences.
We are taught to walk scared late at night. We cradle our keys between our perfectly manicured fingers, walking gracefully like a baby antelope in a herd of lions. That our virginity defines our character. That I am a frigid bitch if I do not fuck him, and a dirty slut if I do."

-Michelle K., The Truth About Growing Up A Woman (via persehpone)

Baby’s Weight and Motherzilla

i went to see a paediatrician  tonight because Kiano’s flu doesn’t seem to get better (it’s been 2 weeks). so i checked, and the doctor gives antibiotic. his weight is decreasing to 8.3kgs from 8.8kgs so yes i’m a little bit sad.

speaking of baby’s weight, i disagree about common people view that a fat child is healthier than a thin one. no, it’s not. i see that some fat children have a difficulty to start to walk, so yeah. i don’t say that fat children are not good, and vice versa.

one more thing, stop saying like, “ya ampun, kurus banget!”, something like that. it’s really annoyinggggg! one day i went to a baby shop nearby my home, i met this young mother who said hi to me and asked about my son’s age. dia mulai membandingkan Kiano dengan anaknya.

  • her : lucunya, umur berapa?
  • me : 8 bulan
  • her : gemuk ya, anakku gak segemuk ini.
  • me : ah ngga juga, ini karena digendong aja jd keliatan gemuk. 
  • her : oh iya, kurus ya! badan anakku kenceng nih, kalo ini lembek.
  • me : (bengong) (wtf)

ok so i assume that she NEEDS to learn MUCH about manner. ibu ibu, stop saying and acting like that. it’s so disrespectful and believe me, nobody would like it. motherhood is not a competition and every child is different. i don’t care what she said because she is just a total-pain-in-the-ass stranger who passed by. and the expert (Kiano’s doctor) always says he has a good health, so why shud i care? but you know, this misbehaved mother is really annoying. try to being nice won’t hurt and keep trashy words in your head, at least. 

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